Do dogs understand kisses? Okay, so I’m sitting here in my tiny, sweaty Mumbai apartment, asking myself this while my adopted street dog, Chai, gives me the most judgy look ever. I’m an American, totally used to smooching my pets back home like they’re my kids, but Chai? He’s not buying it. Like, I went in for a kiss on his scruffy head last week, and he straight-up sneezed in my face—full-on dog snot, y’all. It was so gross I laughed, but also, like, ouch, my ego. So here I am, spilling my embarrassing stories and digging into what experts say about dog affection, because I’m dying to know if I’m just making a fool of myself
It’s 7 PM-ish, and I’m on my creaky balcony, the Mumbai air all humid and smelling like chai stalls and motorbike fumes. Chai’s sprawled out next to me, panting like he’s run a marathon, and every time I lean down for a quick peck, he gives me this look like, “Lady, personal space!” The street’s loud—autorickshaws honking, some dude yelling about mangoes—and I’m just wondering if Chai gets my kisses or if I’m the weirdo here. Let’s figure this out.
Why I Thought Dogs Loved Kisses (Spoiler: I Was So Wrong)
Back in the States, I was all about kissing my old dog, Max, this big goofy Lab who’d just sit there, tail wagging, when I smooched his snout. I thought he loved it, okay? But now I’m in Mumbai, and Chai’s reactions are, like, a total reality check. The other day, we’re chilling on my saggy couch, and I go in for a kiss, and he bolts to the corner, ears back, like I’m some creepy stranger. I’m sitting there, lips all puckered, feeling like a total dork. Did I mention my neighbor saw this through the window? Yeah, mortifying.
I looked it up, and the American Kennel Club says dogs don’t naturally get kisses as affection. To them, it’s just some human getting way too close. They’re more about tail wags or leaning into you. This PetMD article I found totally broke my heart—some dogs might even find kisses stressful, especially if you’re, like, looming over them. And here I was, thinking I was showering Chai with love, when I might’ve been freaking him out. Ugh, I’m such a mess sometimes.
How Dogs Actually Show Affection (And What I’m Slowly Getting)
So if dogs don’t get kisses, how do they say they love you? I’ve been trying to figure out Chai’s deal, and it’s, like, a whole thing. He’s a street dog, so he’s got this tough-guy vibe, but he’s secretly a softie. Like, yesterday I was eating a vada pav (so good, but I totally dropped some on the floor), and Chai just plops his head on my lap, staring up like, “You’re my human, I guess.” No kisses, just pure chill vibes. Rover says dogs show love by leaning on you, following you around, or just hanging nearby. Chai’s my shadow, even when I’m tripping over my own flip-flops.
Here’s what I’ve picked up about dog affection, from Chai and some expert stuff:
- Tail wags aren’t always good. I thought all wags meant happy, but nope—slow, stiff ones mean “back off.” Chai’s tail goes wild when I grab his leash, but when I tried kissing him during a thunderstorm, it was all slow and sus.
- Licking’s not kissing. Dogs lick to bond or, like, taste your food. Chai licked my hand after I spilled curry—pretty sure he just wanted the masala, not to be all lovey-dovey.
- Eye contact’s big. That soft, blinky stare? It’s like a dog hug. Me and Chai had this moment in the rain under a tarp, and it felt way deeper than any kiss.
But, like, I’m no expert. I stared into Chai’s eyes too long once, and he got so weirded out he hid under my bed for an hour. Total fail. The ASPCA says too much eye contact can feel like a challenge to dogs, so I’m trying to chill out with the staring.
My Super Cringe Attempts to Teach Chai Kisses
Okay, real talk: I thought I could train Chai to love kisses. Like, I read this Psychology Today thing about dogs linking human stuff to treats, so I’m like, “Bet, I got this.” I grab some dog biscuits, sit on my sticky kitchen floor (I’m bad at cleaning, okay?), and try to Pavlov my way into Chai’s heart. Kiss, treat, repeat. Total disaster. Now he thinks my face means food, so he just licks my nose like it’s a snack bar. I’m out here with slobber all over my face, and my neighbors definitely saw me through the window. I’m such a clown.
It’s not all bad, though. Chai’s kinda warming up to kisses, especially if I sneak in a belly rub first. I’m learning his signals—like, ears back means “no way,” but if he’s all relaxed and floppy, I can get a quick peck in. Still, I’m no dog guru. I tried kissing him during a power cut, and he just yeeted himself off the couch like I’d insulted him. We’re working on it.
Tips for Showing Dog Affection (Without Looking Like an Idiot)
So, from my, uh, questionable attempts with Chai, here’s some advice for showing your dog love without freaking them out:
- Skip the face kisses. Ear scratches are where it’s at—Chai goes nuts for those.
- Learn their vibe. Some dogs want playtime, others want cuddles. Chai’s all about stealing my snacks and napping on my lap.
- Check their signals. Ears back, tail tucked? Abort. Chill posture? You’re good.
- Use treats, but don’t be dumb like me. I turned Chai into a slobber machine—oops.
The folks at VCA Animal Hospitals say dogs love consistency, so I’m trying to be less of a hot mess with Chai, even if Mumbai’s chaos makes me forget where I parked my brain sometimes.
Do Dogs Understand Kisses? My Half-Baked Answer
So, do dogs understand kisses? I’m still kinda clueless, to be honest. Experts say it’s not their natural thing, but dogs like Chai might get used to it if you’re chill and patient. I’m sitting here now, Chai’s head on my foot, the Mumbai sunset turning the sky all pink and orange, and I’m thinking maybe it’s less about kisses and more about just being there. I kissed Chai’s head just now, and he didn’t run—progress! But, like, he’d probably rather have a piece of chicken.
I’ve screwed up so much with Chai, from the sneeze-in-the-face moment to the treat-kiss fail, but every mess-up’s taught me something about dog affection. If you’re wondering about your dog, just watch their reactions, maybe sneak in a kiss or two, and see what they’re into. It’s all about finding your groove, even if it’s super messy.
Wrapping Up This Dog Kisses Mess
Alright, I gotta go before Chai begs for another walk and I trip over something. Do dogs understand kisses? Probably not at first, but they might come around. I’m still learning Chai’s deal, and it’s a total mess, but it’s our mess. If you’ve got a dog, mess around with how they like to be loved—kisses, scratches, whatever. And if you’ve got any funny dog affection stories, drop ‘em in the comments or hit me up on X—I’m dying to hear ‘em!
